Wednesday, March 31, 2010

The beginning : meet mr cadaver :)

Few days before we met d cadaver, our dean, Dr Ram came into our lecture hall and distributed a piece of paper about d cadaver. I didnt really pay attention on the whole bla3 story about the history of d cadaver, but my eyes were stunned when looking at d very last sentence :


Yes, it may seem to be a bit unappropriate to have a dead body being cut into pieces, its beyond the limitations because as a human being, we are all gifted wif sense of humanity. But after all, it is d only way human beings are able to witness d making of their own body and how wonderful Allah has created each and everyone of us. So beautifully made, perfect..

A day before we went to the dissection hall, i was disturbed wif all kinds of feelings 'bole ke ni nk dissect cadaver?cadaver tu xkacau ke mlm2?agak2 ada org akan pengsan x dlm dissection hall nnt?', yeah, dat kind of thinkings da kept me puzzling throughout d night.

The next day when i woke up, sy bdoa smoga Allah bg kekuatan n smangat utk truskan pjuangan ni, kerana pjuangan ini adalah kerana Dia =) sbaik mlangkah msuk ke dissection hall, kaki da trasa menggeletar, tp time tu cadaver x dibwk msuk lg. so after waiting n waiting, here it comes, the trolley wif a dead body lying on it was heading towards our group. all of a sudden, the hall was in a total silence. agaknya suma org dah start kecut perut time tu. i looked at d cadaver's face, i felt like crying. not bcoz i was scared, but bcoz i was trying to put myself in his position, getting ready to say bye2 to his unruined body parts, as they will be separated apart as time goes by. everyday their body will be immersed in a solution called formalin, it is to preserve the body from decomposing. n everyday they will have to sacrifice their body parts for our lessons, starting from the chest, the back and now, d arm. i kept apologizing d cadaver for being d most cruel person to see his body being cut each n everyday :(

Tok penah psan, kalo nk cium mayat, jgn bg air mata menitik dkt mayat tu. sbb even setitik air mata pn, mayat tu akan rsa sakit sgt2. kalo nk mandikan myt pn kna mandikan slow2, takot sakitkn myt. medically, diz belief doesnt make sense to us aite?bcoz once a person is dead, all the receptors will not be functioning anymore, including d pain receptor. but eventhough sy bdk medic, sy still pcaya apa yg tok ckp tu btol. bcoz many cases in d world cannot be explain scientifically, n sbb kuasa Allah tu xterbatas. kalau dah Dia ckp sakit la myt tu, maka sakit la dia. so diz belief yg membuatkn sy sgt xsanggup nk pegang cadaver tu, during d first class.

1st clas, i kept myself few metres away from d cadaver. The tutor taught us so many things on dat day, but nothing goes inside my head bcoz i was more interested thinking about d cadaver's feelings rather than listening to the lecture. 2nd day, i had more guts to face the cadaver, i told him dat im doing diz for the sake of ppl who are alive, n Allah will repay him for his big sacrifice. n i started to pay attention on the lecture. my tutor started cutting his chest, took out d muscles slice by slice, pulled d vessels one by one. i really felt like dreaming, d scenary in front of my eyes is too much for me to believe what im looking at. i studied science and biology eversince i was a small kid, i learnt dat there r lots of things inside our body, the arteries, nerves, the muscles, bones n all dat, but having to see all those things wif my naked eyes really give me a deep impact. but unfortunately, they r not as colourful as they r in our biology books, all brown n white..haha
3rd day, i touched d cadaver wif my hands (wearing gloves of coz :P) i am becoming more n more eager to find out the miracles inside our body. but until today i still cry whenever i went into the dissection hall, but its not bcoz im sad, but bcoz of d formalin vapour dat entered my eyes. so painful!

Alhamdulillah, i am more n more confident dat i was born for medicine. sometimes d pressure does come, but bcoz of the interests, i am able to stand up and step ahead. paling menarik, mlm2 tido bertemankan real human skeleton dkt laci bwh katil, sumting i never thought i would do. haha. owh yea, strictly speaking, im not going to upload any of d cadavers' photos, bcoz for me, they were once alive juz like us, they hve their own dignity which need to be respected. so, do not expect their photos to be published here okaayyy! :D

till then. hve fun my dear readers~ :)

new spirit =)

hi guys. i think there's no need to introduce myself, cuz since ur here in diz blog, u must be sumwer from my fb profile r my old blog aite? so, d only reason for me to hve diz new blog is dat there has been a big change in my life recently, my life agendas are changing bit by bit, and this should be a turning point between my 'teen' life and 'ty' life, since i am a 20-year-old-girl now. my life in the past is now a history, but the history is actually what makes myself today. after all, im still nur izyani farhana, its just dat i need to grow a bit, see the world in a different view, n make my life sumting not to be regret :)

i am currently in manipal, india. i just started my mbbs, i bet its gotta be a journey wif 1001 challenges from diz point onwards. my family n relatives keep asking me, 'btol ke nk jd doc ni? tak takot ke nk pgang2 mayat?'. but my decision was final, diz is what i want since i was a small tiny minute girl. even during my childhood i play doctor2 wif my cousins n neighbours :D so, it does not matter how difficult the game will be, as long as i have taken part, im juz gonna do my best, and let Him decide the rest.

So, wait for my upcoming posts, its going to be a never ending story about my life as a medical student, and insyaAllah, a future doctor :)